IT BEGINS WITH TEN.
I AM TOLD
AT THE CORE, THAT I MUST FOCUS CHAOTIC DENSITY
OF THOUGHT.
YES. THAT IS SO. FOR I AM TOLD THAT I WILL SEE THE LIGHT.
AND I MUST FRAME THIS FOCUS PLAYFULLY.
AND THAT BELOW I DO NOT SEE THE COMMUNITY AT LARGE.
AND I AM TOLD
I WILL BE THE SATISFACTION
I SEEK
AND I AM TOLD
THAT CLARITY OF SIGHT IS MY GREATEST RESOURCE.
AND THAT MY MIND IS THE ESSENCE OF TALENT .
AND THAT I STAND ON GROUND
WHICH I AM THE MASTER OF .
AND THAT I MUST GIVE UP MY WEEPING.
I DON’T REALLY BELIEVE IN DEATH.
BUT SOMETHING MUST END. YES. AND SOON.
THIS IS MOST LIKELY THE LIES. THE PAIN.
THE LONELY SENSE OF AN INTELLIGENCE
THAT I RELATE TO
WHICH DOES NOT SPEAK BACK. YES. THIS IS SO.
FOR I SHALL PUT A DEATH TO THIS
MYSELF.
YES. THIS IS SO. MATURITY
IS NOT SENILITY. WISDOM
DOESN’T FRIGHTEN ME. WITHOUT A DISPOSABLE BELIEF-SYSTEM
A SHELF-LIFE IS NOT POSSIBLE. I AM PART OF A FAR GRANDER PICTURE……
I AM PATIENT…
I AM NOT THE LEAST BIT WEARY. I HAVE NOT BURNED OUT.
I AM HEADED
TO A WORLD WITHOUT END..
AMEN.
AMEN.
11, MAY 1996
I’M NOT AFRAID OF THE DARK #21
FINNEGAN